it's all coming back
I HATE THIS!!! for the last 3 damm days all i've been doing is crying when i get home.

I know its not just cuz i think john doesn;t like me. Its because all this low self esteem shit is coming back. The summer was great I was happy didn't cry once. I started thinking i was pretty and a nice person. then all of a sudden i go back to school on the like second week and i have a crush on this new guy named John nad all this i'm ugly i'm stupid shit comes coming back.

i've talked to him and he sounds really nice and stuff. hes in a band hes really punkish sorta. And then now he doesn't even like look at me when he sees me he turns around. And at first i'm like mabye he doesn't like me cuz he thinks i dress preppy (which i do but that doens't matter right??) but then today and yesteday hes talking to some prep girls that are all like oh my god {giggle} hehe thats like so cool! {giggle} WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!! So i'm like that must not matter. so i start getting into all this shit like i'm ugly.

WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN??? I HATE MYSELF!!!!! I HATE GUYS!!!!!!!!! I HATE HOW I HATE HOW I'M SOO UGLY!!!!! AND I HATE MY DAD 4 MAKING MY MOMMY CRY ALL THE TIME.

!!!!!!I WANNA GO BACK TO SUMMER!!!!!!!!!!!

hUgS aNd CoOkIeS~

~~ME~~

<<|>>

(2002-09-06)(9:57 p.m.)

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_Me
Najeah. 18. Bluenette (Blue and Brown Hair). SXE. Community College. Single. Unique. Weird. Bad Speller. Spoiled. Graphic and Fashion Designer.

LOVES
Penguins. Bono. U2. Music. Friends. Writing. Britney Spears. Versace. Paris and Nicky Hilton. Sleeping. Eating.

Hates Mean People. Bratty People. Abuse. Energy Drinks. Bunnies. Avril Lavinge. Justin Timberlake. X-tina. Mirrors. American Eagle and Ambercrombie and all of those other shitty stores.

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